“I can’t afford that, it just costs too much money”. Your successful response to a kinesthetic “I appreciate how you feel. Other clients have felt that way until they discovered the benefits for them.”

For a kinesthetic this is a great response. For a visual that tells you “it is just to costly”, if you used the above response they think you are manipulative and superficial.


The visual needs to hear, “I see what you are saying. Other clients have said the same thing until they see how this item is clearly worth the price.”

While the auditory wants to hear the words “I hear what you are saying, but other clients have shared with me what they found out about the product.”

Now you understand the mental processing of the auditory, visual and kinesthetic.


How many times has a telemarketer  who has a script, whose income depends upon numbers, called you? Did you feel that they really had your best interest at heart?  Or when you have been in a meeting  talking to someone you want to build a rapport with  yet you are constantly looking over his or her shoulder to see who is coming in the door?

If you want to build rapport, you have to respect or empathy for the person’s needs or wants.  If you don’t have that subconscious mind set, the person you are trying to build rapport with  will feel your true energy, hear the real tone in your voice or see intuitively the real picture you have them in your mind.



Chewing on a pencil or another object: Indicates  they are looking for more information to input into the equation.  On a deeper subconscious level they are asking, “what do I get from this deal?”

Rubbing their eyes: I am not seeing, hearing or feeling what you are saying to me.  I don’t get it! Or they are to tired to absorb anymore information  so stop.

Leaning forward or sitting on the edge of their chair: Give me more information  we are on the same wave-length. Now you can move them closer to the answers you want to receive.

Opening up their jacket or outer covering: Come on over  or I am open to what you say and like it.  This is the time to close the deal.

Tilting their Head: Forward  indicates they are interested, tilted backwards  you are coming on to strong  but they are willing to put up with it for a few more minutes.

Breathing – in short breathes:  Frustration level is going off the charts – unless you can get this stopped your deal is about to die.
Clenching your hands:  You don’t have to be a Rocket Scientist to read this one – your clue is being aware it is happening.

Observing the other person’s body movements ALMOST tells it all!

Arms folded across their upper-torso: This type of signal tells you I don’t even want you here or someone else made me do this. Unless you can build a rapport with this person in the first 4 minutes walk away. Go kill the person who set this up.

Crossed legs: You have lost their attention or they are protecting themselves usually from what they don’t know. You have made them uncomfortable. Could they be an auditory? You are asking them to see the product.

Rubbing their face: Is this the person who can really make a decision? This may be a kinesthetic internalizing everything first or are they only the messenger? Be sure you know before you put all of your eggs in one basket than decide what is the plan of action.

Touching their nose: Liar, Liar your pants are on fire goes with this body language. To correct this perception start really paying attention to what the other person is saying. Start using them in YOUR conversation. This could be an auditory who isn’t hearing the words that make them comfortable.


People who build rapport easily with the person(s) they want to motivate to their way of thinking  AREN’T BORN,  they are trained.
Establishing rapport  always leads to positive outcomes. When you are “IN” rapport with someone, they begin to feel “IN” harmony with you  creating the trust necessary to have a positive outcome from the meeting. 

When you are building rapport  you need to be very aware of the level/intensity you are creating.  A sales situation  requires a certain level of rapport. (If you are being resisted, you know that your rapport level is to low.) If you move up and out of the appropriate level of rapport during your meeting. You are going to step across a line subliminally that can lead to a situation  you don’t want to continue. WE CALL IT MIXED MESSAGES! So it is important to maintain the level of rapport that is appropriate for each situation.

Learn in dept How to Communicate Subliminally  9.99